My Online Friends Have Made The Difference

When I started this whole blogging thing, I had no idea I would ever make "friends" on the internet. Actually, considering how private a person I am, it is rather shocking that I have shared so much of myself and my life with the whole world. It has, however, been and is a wonderful experience.

Over the weekend, my community gave me a "surprise" online birthday party. My birthday is actually January 17th, but it is always easiest to chat on the weekend and so we laughed and chatted for two hours. It was fun and I immensely enjoyed their company. They are a wonderful group of people that are there for each other and me.

On my birthday, I will actually have a Twitter birthday chat with the hashtag of #TRR. I've never had a Twitter party, so I guess it will be fun to see how it all pans out. Hopefully you will help make it a success! No matter what, it will be my birthday, so it should be a fun and new experience. It might even give me something to blog about! Fathom that one!

There are many people online that I talk with every day. My "friends" are growing and yet, it is nice to still have the personal touch of chatting with them on Twitter, Facebook and in my community.

During my darkest days, I remember the kind words of encouragement that you gave me. I clung to your words of hope. I didn't believe them at the time, but I wanted desperately for you to be right. You know what? You were right because I am about to celebrate another birthday which means that I made it to a better place.

I want to thank you all for reading my blog and for those that make comments, I truly appreciate the effort you make to jot down your remarks. I appreciate all the Facebook comments and Twitter mentions and shout outs which have not only helped my blog readership to grow, but also has connected me with some really intelligent and super nice people.

Since Tuesday is my birthday and my foot is actually feeling better, I am once again excited about attaining my six pack abs for my next birthday. I already forewarned my family that I will be bearing my tummy for them to oooh and aaah over. Hopefully they won't be blinded by the glow-in-the-dark skin. (wink).

On a serious note, let me say, sincerely and with my most heartfelt emotions, thank you for everything.

Sorry. I just couldn't resist the kitty picture! I couldn't stay serious for too long!





Now, the time we have all been anxiously awaiting...This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community where you will find THE BEST people in the world! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.



With a big, heartfelt thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation.

• Joan at A Bad Marriage Is Fattening


• Aleta at Aleta's Arty Facts


• Katlupe at Homesteading On The Internet


• Pam (no blog)


• Meg at Mergie


• Kathy at Birth Touch


• PJ at PJ's Prayer Line


• Paula at The Wandering Hearth


• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats

I'm so glad that I've been able to become friends with these wonderful people who are so active in my community. I encourage you to add their blogs to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with us in my community.

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below and thank you for your participation!!



<a href="http://www.theredheadriter.com" target="_blank"><img style="width: 150px; height: 150px;" border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg"/></a>
Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.

Woo Us To Your Blog

As always, attached is the weekly Linky to enter either the main URL to your site or add each post you publish throughout the week. You don't have to do anything special, just drop your link in and get a little extra exposure to your site.













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Loving People By Halves

"There is nothing I would not do
for those who are really my friends.
I have no notion of loving people by halves,
it is not my nature."
~Jane Austen~

In so many ways, I am Erica Barry in the movie, "Something's Gotta Give." It is a story about Barry (Jack Nicholson) who has been a player and confirmed bachelor on the cusp of being a senior citizen. However, he has always dated younger women and then he meets Erica (Diane Keaton), an accomplished woman closer to his age.

There is a poignant part in the movie where Harry breaks up with Erica and the following is the dialogue afterwards:

Erica Barry: [Erica kisses Harry] This is heartbroken. How's that for impervious.

Harry: You're killing me.

Erica Barry: I just wish that it had lasted more than a week.

Harry: Me too.

Erica Barry: That is a terrible thing to say. You know, the life I had before you, I knew how to do THAT. I could do THAT forever. But now look at me. What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do with all this?

Erica Barry is stating the same basic thought as Jane Austen which is how do you love someone by halves, a little bit, not wholeheartedly or sometimes?

I think love is...

...The look found on a mother's face while she watches her children play. Motherhood is a lifetime role and doesn't end just because the child grows up.

...Service without thinking of it as an interruption or sacrifice.

...Saying the words "I love you" because you know the other person needs to hear them.

...Doing the little things for the person to show you care about them.

...Worth the effort and loving someone will mold you into a better person.

...Missing the person when they are away from you whether it be for a day or for the rest of your life on earth.

So I ask, "How can you love a friend or family member by halves?"

You either love someone or you don't and there isn't any halves to it.

Love is beautiful and the emotion permeates throughout a relationship lifting it to realm where evil can not touch. It is a place where families find a haven and a friend's shoulder to cry on is only a moment away.

I love entirely and have never bought into the idea of loving a little bit which is why I get my heart broken so easily. But I am who I am and I'll take that over being bitter, sour and unloving any day.

How do you feel about the concept of loving people by halves? Can you do it? Can you love people just a little bit?






This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

With a big thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation:

• Bev at EBlebco.com


• Katlupe at Homesteading on the Internet


• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats


• Kim at The Zany Housewife


• Aleta at Paws For Thought


• Deb at Just Short Of Crazy


• Suzanne at One Thousand Gifts


• Diane at Rodan and Fields Dermatologists Skin Care


• Kristi at The Child Sensitive Communication Grid

I'm so glad that I've been able to become friends with these lovely ladies who are so active in my community. I encourage you to add their blogs to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with us in my community.

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below (Yeah, we do crazy poses like that too because we are stylish LOL) and thank you for your participation!!





<a href="http://www.theredheadriter.com" target="_blank"><img style="width: 150px; height: 150px;" border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg" /></a>

Until the spotlight next week...Happy Chatting Rockin' Friends!

Don't forget to add your blog URL to the Linky at Woo Us To Your Blog and learn blogging tips that will help you have a polished blog and to increase your traffic! This week it is all about analyzing load time! No, I'm not talking about putting the groceries into your vehicle. It's about your blog! Do you know the secrets?

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.

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The Knife In My Back

The wound is usually deep, wide, bleeds for a long time and is very hard to get over. I'm sure you have known a person who finds pleasure in inflicting this type of terrible pain on others. No? Sure you do! We call them backstabbers.

A backstabber is "A traitor or hypocrite, such as a co-worker or friend assumed trustworthy, but who verbally attacks when one's back is turned."

These people may claim to be your "best friends" or a co-worker who has "got your back," but they are really mean-spirited, gossiping liars. Backstabbers have a goal of personal gain or power and can cause real damage. Whether it is in your social circle or at work, the lies told by this type of person are damaging and often can't be undone even if confronted and proven to be wrong.

When I was married to my first husband, we were able to have lunch with each other almost every day. He would pick me up at the door and then we would drive to the parking lot of the nearest bank, park under the trees and eat our lunch. At the time, he had a tiny little truck and the big cooler we used to keep our lunch fresh barely fit between us.

Most people thought that our young love was "so cute" or "just beautiful." All I knew was that I enjoyed our times together. I was too young and naive to understand the harm of backstabbers in the workplace.

On one bright, sunny day, my manager called me into her office. She was young and had never been a manager before and in retrospect, I bet she was nervous.

"How are you doing today?" she asked.

Thinking it was a weird question considering I only had about an hour before my "day" was over, I said, "Fine, thank you."

"That's good," she said while looking down and slightly shaking her head up and down. "Did you enjoy your lunch?"

Now I knew this was a very strange conversation. "Yes, very much," I said.

"The whole building is buzzing and it is because of your lunches with your husband. You have to stop eating lunch with him," she boldly stated.

The building where I worked was a LARGE building with MANY floors. I had absolutely NO IDEA why anyone was talking about my lunch, nor did I understand why she thought I had to stop eating with my husband.

"I'm not going to stop eating lunch with my husband," I replied just as boldly.

"If you do not stop having lunch with your husband, I am going to fire you."

Completely confused and quite angry I said, "You CAN NOT fire me for having lunch with my husband! Why are you saying this to me!?!"

In a very calm voice and looking me straight in the eyes, she said, "Everyone is talking about how you go down to lunch with your husband and have sex in the parking lot of the bank every day. That is very bad business behavior."

I think my jaw probably dropped to the floor, but just as quickly my redheaded anger shot to the ceiling. At the time, I did not control my temper at all. In fact, my temper controlled me which is why I yelled, "I DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH MY HUSBAND IN THE PARKING LOT OF THE BANK! WHERE DID YOU GET SUCH AN ABSURD IDEA! WE BARELY FIT IN HIS TRUCK WITH THE COOLER BETWEEN US!!!!"

That is when she made her mistake. She glanced out her "all glass office wall" behind me. I whipped around to see her staring straight at the older, redheaded woman in my department who was looking straight at us. Suddenly, it all made sense and my stomach sank.

"I'm going to consider this conversation over, but first I want to tell you something," I said barely containing my anger through gritted teeth, "I have never had sex in the truck in front of the bank. My husband and I are newlyweds and we enjoy talking as we eat our lunch each day. We don't go out to lunch because we do not make enough money to do so which is why I pack our food in a giant cooler. You obviously have believed a liar and I highly advise you to let her know that I am getting an attorney. I am going to sue her for slander and you for falsely accusing me."

Now it was my manager's turn to have her jaw drop. I knew that we did not have the money for an attorney to sue such a larger corporation, but it sounded good anyway. I calmly stood up, opened her office door and stood briefly in the doorway looking at everyone in the large open area. My eyes stopped and rested on the gossiping, backstabber. She squirmed in her chair and looked down at her desk.

Seething, I walked to my desk, grabbed my purse and went straight to the Human Resources department.

Although both the redheaded backstabber and my manager had to apologize to me, the rumors were very much alive and in my face the entire time I worked for the company. I was so embarrassed for such a very long time and cried many a tear over the humiliating lies.

I know that I am not the only person who has suffered from the words of a backstabber, so here are a few tips to help you avoid being in situations that can be quite unpleasant:

• Beware of people that "seem" ingenuous and believe your gut reaction.
• Remember there is a difference between friends and acquaintances. Especially recognize pushy people who want to get something from you all the time or have you do something for them constantly.
• Pay attention to the things that are going on around you.
• If you hear a rumor about yourself, immediately confront the people who are talking about you.
  
• Do not tell secrets to people who are known to have "loose lips" and can not keep a confidence.
  
• If someone betrays you, beware of ever trusting them again.
• If the backstabber goes too far with the slanderous gossip at work, speak to your boss, the human resources department or the backstabber's boss. If the person is in your personal life, consider staying away from them and don't mingle in the same social circles.
• Do not confront the backstabber face-to-face alone or in a secluded location.
• Do not under estimate the power of a backstabber.
• Since backstabbers are manipulators, be aware of how much you are doing for someone who doesn't ever reciprocate in an equally helpful way.

I have many knife scars in my back as I'm sure you do too, but I think I'm a better person because of them. Lessons learned the hard way are never forgotten, so I chalk it all up to that now. I also laugh a lot about how jealous that woman must have been of my very handsome husband. Just remember this...We can not change other people nor can we control their actions, but we can rise above them if we stay in control of our own actions.

Just to prove I'm totally over it all, I think I should have sex in front of the bank tomorrow.

(Hysterically laughing at the thought of doing such a thing!)

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Rockin' Friends Spotlight - Do you know me?

How well you know someone is directly proportional to the amount of time you communicate, share and spend with them.

Being cared for, loved, and understood is a two way street. It requires the willingness to share yourself and for someone to spend the time needed to understand and appreciate the information shared.

Let's use me as example. My mother knows me on so many levels, but that is only because we have spent time together and have talked for numberless hours. We have shared the highs, the lows, the happy and the devastating. I know she loves me and vice versa. Mom knows me.

For instance, Mom knows that...

My favorite cookie is thick chocolate chip hot and fresh out of the oven.



I could live in the library with the lovely smell of books.



I feel a great sense of peace listening to the crash of waves on the beach.



I am not motivated by money and power. I just want us all to live comfortably without fighting and have plenty to eat and a roof over our head to protect us from the elements.



I am terrified of heights and bridges.



I love learning.



I miss the days when Alyssa was young and we played all day.



I feel happy in the snow and love being all snuggled in warm flannel clothes.



I love easily and I'm easily hurt.



Jesus Christ is the center of all my choices even though I often fall short and choose unwisely.



There is no shortcut or substitute for getting to know what makes a person tick and all the intricacies that make them a unique individual. Society understands this concept although sometimes subconsciously. Don't we think it is just absolutely marvelous when someone has been married fifty years or when friends started their friendship in first grade? Yes, we do and that is my point exactly.

If you feel unloved and do not have any friends, look in the mirror. You have a wall around you that not only do others avoid trying to penetrate, but you also do not open the door to let them know you are available to be loved. It is worth taking the chance and making the effort to have these relationships. No, they will not always work out, but when they do, they are priceless.




This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

With a big thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation:

• Joan at A Bad Marriage Is Fattening


• Kim at The Zany Housewife


• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats

• Katlupe at Homesteading on the Internet
  

• PJ at PJ's Prayer Line


• Kristi at The Child Sensitive Communication Grid


• Lori at Lori's LOLz


• Paula at Love Is A Journey


• Jamie at Avant Garde Parenting

This week the special spotlight is shining on Joan of A Bad Marriage Is Fattening. Joan's "About Me" is as follows:

"Joan Oshatz has a Master of Fine Arts in Screenwriting from UCLA School of Theater, Film and Television. She has written two screenplays, Kidnapping Margo Sterling and June Bride Feldman.

Joan’s blog A Bad Marriage Is Fattening is a literary mélange of humor and pathos which she plans to publish as a memoir.

Why does Joan write about a bad marriage being fattening? Because she is an expert on a bad marriage and gaining weight, having been in her own bad marriage for twenty years. She went from 125 pounds at the beginning of her marriage to 275 pounds by the time her marriage ended and she divorced her physician husband."

You don't have to read Joan's blog for long before you realize that she has "imaginary conversations with many people" in her life.

Just like me, Joan has a wonderful relationship with her mother and I say "has" because even though people pass from this world, they truly are not ever gone from our lives.

"Last night I started to think about my mother. Nobody has ever loved me as much as my mother did. Even when we had our differences, I always knew that Mother loved me. And nobody has ever given me better advice than Mother."

In I Am Not My Weight - I Am So Much More Joan has a conversation with her mother that is a definite "got to read" post.

I'm sure we can all find something to relate to in Reality Sucks when Joan faces reality instead of continuing in denial. It is such a shame that we can not keep our heads in the sand sometimes, isn't it?

Obviously, Joan's marriage to her husband was not filled with a whole lot of happiness. After reading Love Is a Mutual Misunderstanding, I think can all relate to a relationship where we are perceived as being the "bad guy" or "the stupid one." It definitely creates an ocean of pain.

I know that so many people chase after and often marry the wrong person. Then in hindsight we wonder if we had gone slightly insane to do such a crazy thing! Well, Joan can understand this just just like we do because she has lived it.

Another great post was about Joan's plan to lose all her weight as outlined in Accountability and it is so true that Addictions Are Hard To Break regardless of the vice. Last but not least, YOU JUST HAVE TO READ My Mad, Passionate, Wildly Sex-Crazed Nights With My Refrigerator to truly appreciate Joan's genius.

I'm so glad that I've been able to get to know Joan better since she has become active in my community and by reading her blog. Be sure to add A Bad Marriage Is Fattening to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with Joan in my community.

The community challenge this week was an effort to promote your blog with style. Thank you to all the participants for working so hard at making the community a success and challenging yourself this week. Not only the community benefits, but we all have been able to support and encourage each other which is an invaluable experience.

The winner of the challenge is:

Joan at A Bad Marriage Is Fattening

I'm sure we are all quite happy that Joan won this week since she almost brought us a salad that would feed 491 people in a one of a kind Swavorski Crystal bowl to our Block Party! Congratulations Joan! A warm thank you for being our Rockin' Friend! We all appreciate the effort you have made to get to know us better and the support you have shown in our individual blogging efforts.

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below and thank you for your participation!!




<a href="http://theredheadriter.blogspot.com" target="_blank"><img border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg" /></a>

Until the spotlight next week...Happy Chatting Rockin' Friends!

Don't forget to add your blog URL to the Linky at Woo Us To Your Blog and learn blogging tips that will help you have a polished blog and to increase your traffic! This week it is all about the Alexa Toolbar!! Did you know that it could help your PR ranking?

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.




Forever grateful for my mother,

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Rockin' Friends Spotlight - Comfortable Silence

"True friendship comes
when the silence
between two people
is comfortable."
~David Tyson Gentry~


What are some of the ways you can stay in touch with your friends so that they know you care?

Often when I sit down at the computer keyboard, I just stare. I think about all the information that is available with a click of a button or more precisely a mouse. At the other end of this internet connection are people who read my blog and through past interactions, I now call them my friends.

I also have a commitment to my daughter to record our history together... something worth leaving behind. Lately, I'm feeling my mortality and it isn't comfortable.

So I try to balance my journaling with my interests, helping others learn through blogging tips that I enjoy teaching, and promoting my friends. It hasn't been hard thus far and I feel a great accomplishment and satisfaction in my blogging. I have found words for the incessant clamoring in my brain that fight to get out to be recorded while the sentimental side of me just wants to be remembered.

Through all of this blogging with my life's ups and downs, happinesses and dropping to the depths of hellish depression, my blogging friends do what best friends do...they encourage me to continue and not to give up. Some are eloquent and write at length while others leave a simple heartfelt message that simply says, "My thoughts and prayers are with you."

The comfortable silence of friends who love me let me know they are there and will hang back to pass me the tissue to blow my nose when needed. It takes both kinds of friends, the eloquent and those that offer few and powerful words to keep me going during stressful times.

If you are one of those friends with the heartfelt few and powerful words because you can't think of anything else to say to me, that's okay. I feel it. I appreciate it. Your words touch me and in our comfortable silence, you also give me strength.

Never underestimate the power of your comfortable silent support of another. Emotional bonds of caring will always be stronger than the written word.





This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

With a big thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation:

• Katlupe at Homesteading on the Internet


• Jamie at Avant Garde Parenting


• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats


• Lori at Lori's LOLz


• Kristi at The Child Sensitive Communication Grid


• Kim at The Zany Housewife


• Lis at An American Girl In Bristol


• Esther at Laugh With Us Blog


• Paula at Love Is A Journey

This week the special spotlight is shining on Melissa of An American Girl In Bristol. Melissa's "About Me" is as follows:

"I'm an American girl who is just trying to figure out my life before I turn 30. I currently am in college studying Education. I love cooking, literature, 80's movies and music, musical theater, and traveling. I also love sarcasm and laughing. A lot. Especially at myself."

Her nickname is Lis and she has a cute, relaxed profile pic. I couldn't resist highlighting her.



A few posts into her new blog, Lis told of her plans to move to another country in "By nature man hates change...." Needless to say, I would be terrified at the thought of moving that far away and I've never said or thought "I've honestly always longed to be elsewhere."

I have, however, felt a lot like this...

"I want what I do to be noticed and appreciated, and I feel down when I'm not. Yet when I am noticed or complimented, I reject it. I know that I am a perfectionist when it comes to college and my coursework. I feel badly when I don't get everything right, even if I have done really well."

I'm sure we can all find something to relate to in this lovely post about self-examination of our lives and its worth.

Since Lis is in college, she has a different perspective on many aspects of life because she is young and just beginning all the excitement. After reading Top Ten List for Surviving...Most Anything ,I agree that the list can also be applied to our every day life and not just when we are cruising through college...well, everything except for #6 which I do not like at all.

I thought a lot about "What happens to a dream deferred?" because I've had a few dreams of my own that haven't gone as planned. Did I tell you that Lis is getting married?

I'm sure you'll want to read about "Happy marriages begin..." and hear the juicy details with lovely photos too. In Bizzare Marriage Laws in America I was very grateful not to live in Connecticut on Sunday. Last but not least Introducing Slow Cooker Saturday sounds and looks absolutely delicious which reminds me that it is nearly ice cream time.

I'm so glad that I've been able to get to know Lis better since she has become active in my community and by reading her blog. Be sure to add An American Girl In Bristol to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with Lis in my community.

The community challenge this week was an effort to become better sales people with a definite plan of action involved. Thank you to all the participants for working so hard at making the community a success and challenging yourself this week. Not only the community benefits, but we all have been able to support and encourage each other which is invaluable.

The winner of the challenge is:

Lori at Lori's LOLz

Congratulations Lori! A warm thank you for being our Rockin' Friend! We all appreciate the effort you have made to get to know us better and the support you have shown in our individual blogging efforts.

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below and thank you for your participation!!




<a href="http://theredheadriter.blogspot.com" target="_blank"><img border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg" /></a>

Until the spotlight next week...Happy Chatting Rockin' Friends!

Don't forget to add your blog URL to the Linky at Woo Us To Your Blog and learn blogging tips that will help you have a polished blog and to increase your traffic! This week it is all about Google Alerts!! Do you know that it is kind of like spying on the internet!

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.




Hoping to be remembered and doing something worthy of being remembered,

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For Your Viewing Pleasure

It is always said that there is a silver lining to every cloud. Today there is a heart.

I just wanted to give you a little something back after all the wonderful comments you made yesterday in an effort to comfort me and buoy my spirits. So here are some pretty pictures of products you can buy that are also very relaxing to the eye. I created a "Treasury" in Etsy to help support the vendors and to add beauty to your day. I hope you enjoy!



Black and White

and

Sew Close to my Heart








Loving my followers who are really my friends,

Not holding it against any of the men that
they are the same gender as my husband.
(I haven't lost all my sense of humor)

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Rockin' Friends Spotlight - Positive People Are Cheerleaders

"Keep away from those who
try to belittle your ambitions.
Small people always do that,
but the really great make you believe
that you too can become great."~Mark Twain~

Don't you feel better around people who believe you both can accomplish anything you set your mind to doing? I know that I do. True friends lift you up and hold you when you think you are going to fall!

It is a constant struggle for most women to "like" themselves, so being with others who are positive about your ambition is very important for maintaining your own sense of accomplishment. Staying focused, having patience, persevering and working hard are really the keys to any success. Having friends that will cheer you on will make the whole experience fun and exciting as well as a motivator when you begin to slump.

My daughter, Alyssa, is my sunshine. When I am with her, I feel that I can do anything and accomplish all my goals. She has a fresh perspective on the future and I know that she loves me. It is wonderful having that type of person in my life. I know that Mom feels the same way, but I have a hard time separating her Motherly-prejudice-for-her-child and that of her being another woman who is also my motivating friend. I appreciate both of their positive support of my endeavors.

This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

With a big thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation:

• Holly at Diamond Potential
• Kristi at The Child Sensitive Communication Grid
• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats
• Katlupe at Homesteading on the Internet
• Falen at The Colorful Rants of a Fed Up Sista
• Kim at The Zany Housewife
• Bernice at Ramblings of a Woman
• Bry at Embracefire Fitness
• Elaine at Elaine Hopper, Romance Writer

This week the special spotlight is shining on Bernice of Ramblings of a Woman. Bernice's "About Me" reads as follows:

I am a woman in my mid-forties, working a job in corporate America...I have strived to be a good mother, a good wife, a good person. I have learned many things along the way and I still have a lot to learn. I have dealt with depression, perfectionism, and personal near-death tragedies. This blog is a place for me to write about and share my ramblings and hope that my words may bring you a little joy, a few tears, and the relief that YOU are not alone in how you feel.

Bernice has a post on her blog called "40 Ways To Live And Not Merely Exist." I would suggest that everyone check this post out because her list is fantastic!

I love Dr. Seuss and think I have personally read every book a million times to Brittany and Alyssa! So it is no surprise that I really enjoyed reading "Your Potential According to Dr Seuss…" I just never tire of the rhythmic rhyme found in his books. This message, however, is more than just fun - it is actually inspiring and is something we should all remember.

Many people have inner demons from the past. Having coped with my own, I appreciated the post "Is your future being held hostage by your past?" Unfortunately, I definitely could relate with the times that I would "sit and cry a puddle of tears."

"Normal, that’s what I wanted to be" and me too! Bernice had her own set of reasons for wanting to be normal. Because of her revelation, she becomes the person we can relate to and want to be our friend.

I'm so glad that I've been able to get to know Bernice better since she has become active in my community and by reading her blog. Be sure to add Ramblings of a Woman to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with Bernice in my community.

I had another special challenge in my community this week and everyone who accomplished this goal had their name eligible for a $25 gift card! The challenge was to start five discussions and make 75 total "posts/comments" in The Redhead Riter community. I really enjoyed the great discussions started this week.

The winner of the $25 Gift Card with a whopping total of 103 comments made in my community is Holly at Diamond Potential!! Congratulations!

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below and thank you for your participation!!




<a href="http://theredheadriter.blogspot.com" target="_blank"><img border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg" /></a>

Until the spotlight next week...Happy Chatting Rockin' Friends!

Don't forget to add your blog URL to the Linky at Woo Us To Your Blog and learn blogging tips that will help you have a polished blog and to increase your traffic! This week it is all spiders and pictures!!

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.




Your redheaded cheerleader,





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Rockin' Friends Spotlight - Be The Friend

"The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing... not healing, not curing... that is a friend who cares."~Henri Nouwen~

I always tell my daughter that it isn't the "number" of friends that she has...it is the "quality" and "sincerity" of the people she calls friends.

In order to have great friends, I believe that you have to also make the effort to be a great friend. The first trait required is unselfishness with time, talent and resources even when you don't feel like it or it isn't convenient.

When you exhibit unselfish traits, people are naturally drawn to you. There is something about a giving person that just makes you want to be around them and share experiences with them. Have you known people that are always unselfish and thinking of others? They are easy to spot....There is always a crowd of happy people around them.


This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

With a big thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation:

• Katlupe at Homesteading on the Internet
• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats
• Kim at The Zany Housewife
• Kristi at The Child Sensitive Communication Grid
• Nan at Quality Time
• Bry at Embracefire Fitness
• Holly at Diamond Potential
• Tina at Little Tots ~ Big Ideas
• Marty at Barefoot and Pony Tailed

This week the special spotlight is shining on Kristi of The Child Sensitive Communication Grid. Kristi's "About Me" reads as follows:

This site was developed as an informal place where I can communicate directly with our customers (long-time customers and new ones) about all the latest happenings at Karyn Henley Resources (a.k.a. Child Sensitive Communication, LLC)....Who am I anyway? My name is Kristi and I've been the office manager for Karyn 14 years. I will be the author of this blog. I've had the pleasure of meeting a few of you and have spoken with many of you over the years. You may have even heard my voice on a Playsongs video. If you want to know more, you'll have to ask.

So I'm sure your first question is, "Well, what is some of the stuff offered at this site anyway?"

Guess what?

I'm going to tell you! (Isn't that just a shocker?!)


One of the series that Kristi has started on the blog is called the "Behavior Management" series which I think every parent struggles with at some point. In part two of the series, the "What can I do when a child needs security" is discussed. If all parents would remember this crucial part of the advice given..."Be patient with the child as he learns self-control and guide him in making the right choices," I think children would be happier because fewer parents would go psycho over their whining children. Understanding and patience is truly the key.

Kristi also provides an activity to download regularly. I love so many of them! Do mother's today realize all the information that can truly add such wonderful value to child rearing?!

Is Your Child's Bible Only An Accessory? was once again a reminder for me to make sure that God's word isn't simply a decoration on my end table, but something that I read each day.

Play, Pray, Speak, and Act teaches great steps to take when speaking and disciplining children. I think it is much more effective than simply counting to ten and definitely better than screaming.

My favorite post is called Summertime = Playtime. Playtime = Building Relationships with Kids simply because I became lost in memories of my own sweet daughter and niece. There was nothing better than spending all day setting up the living room as the "City of Barbie" and then playing all day for the next three days in Barbie's city. I never grew tired of listening to both girls talk on and on in animated voices for their Barbie or Ken. Of course, my Barbie family wasn't as hip and cool as theirs because I would stare at the girls playing "too much" in their opinion.

The memories are so beautiful.

It has been a wonderful pleasure getting to know Kristi in my community and by reading her blog. Be sure to add The Child Sensitive Communication Grid on your blogroll, but also come over and chat with her in my community.

I had a special challenge in my community this week and we had so much fun! The challenge was to start ten discussions. I don't know about you, but sometimes it is hard to think of a new topic for a discussion, but this week was the perfect example of teamwork. So many people chatted and there was a wonderful array of topics.

I wanted to recognize the people who accomplished the Community Goal this week and to thank them for their imaginative questions. It was so much fun!

These wonderful people created 10 extremely interesting discussions that we all enjoyed. Come on in the community and get to know these lovely ladies and read their interesting blogs...

• Katlupe at Homesteading on the Internet
• Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats
• Kim at The Zany Housewife
• Kristi at The Child Sensitive Communication Grid
• Tina at Little Tots ~ Big Ideas
• Kim at The Domestic Jock
• Lisa at Popcorn Served Daily

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below and thank you for your participation!!




<a href="http://theredheadriter.blogspot.com" target="_blank"><img border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg" /></a>

Until the spotlight next week...Happy Chatting Rockin' Friends!

Don't forget to add your blog URL to the Linky at Woo Us To Your Blog and learn blogging tips that will help you have a polished blog and to increase your traffic! This week it is all about creating a magical link!

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.




Your friend,

{{{{{HUGGGGGSSSS}}}}}

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The Duck That Thinks She's Mariah Carey

I've always been fascinated by Mariah Carey's five-octave vocal range. She can pierce the eardrums with the high notes and yet still sing the lower, husky and warm notes. Even if you don't like her style of music, it is easy to appreciate her beautiful singing voice. Since I sound like a dying cow when I sing, I really appreciate the talent she has shared with the rest of the world.

The other day this average looking duck waddled around some plants on the way to a little pond not too far down the road. It was cute enough, I thought, as long as it didn't leave anything behind...if you are following my train of thought.

I watched this feathery creature duck (pun intended) in and out while quacking loudly. This brown duck didn't just quack once or twice, it continuously quacked in a range of voices. At first it was the middle notes which were followed by deeper, longer quacks, but that wasn't enough for this duck. She also felt the need to produce a high pitch screaming quack.


The next thing I knew, she was waddling away out of sight and had stopped quacking. That started my wheels turning as I compared this duck to Mariah Carey and life.

Mariah Carey came into the public eye in 1989 and after numerous awards and top hits, disappeared for a few years and then made a big comeback in 2005 with the release of her album The Emancipation of Mimi.

Many people or life events also follow this same path. We experience births, deaths, parties, jobs, anniversaries, homes, cars and the list goes on and on. These things come into our lives and then time happens, changes occur and the experiences pass.

So often we are not "in" the moment. We do not see and appreciate the people and possessions we already have in our lives. Often, "I want more, more, more" becomes the guiding theme. More is not always better. New is not always better. Old stuff isn't simply old, it is often comforting and enjoyable.

I want to be like that when I'm "old stuff"...comforting and enjoyable. I also do not want to take any experience for granted. Living each day to the fullest requires constantly remembering to notice the little things and remain in the moment.

As thrilling as it was when Mariah Carey made her returning debut, it was equally unexciting when the duck returned quacking in a huge voice and leaving things behind for me to remember her.


I wonder if we cultivate relationships in such a manner that people are happy with our return and grateful for being part of the experiences we leave behind.

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