A woman's home is her castle and domain. She usually cleans, cooks, decorates, rearranges, repairs, works, plays and relaxes within the walls of her home. Sometimes women choose to stay home to raise their children instead of working outside of the home. I was one of those women.
After finally getting pregnant, surviving the pregnancy and birth, I found my home to be a haven. For a long time I was healing physically, emotionally and mentally. My body had been to Hell and back during the nine months I carried my daughter only to have even more trauma during her birth. Being able to take naps, putter and relax was just what my weakened body needed. Plus, nursing was a breeze because I was unhurried and very comfortable. Staying home definitely healed my broken body.
Watching other families grow one child after the next was a nightmare when I didn't think I would ever be able to have my own child. People unintentionally and sometimes intentionally said the most unkind and thoughtless things to me. After having Alyssa, I was able to let my heart heal from the wounds. I basked in the love of my child and enjoyed the emotional high from my motherhood. I watched and marveled at every nuance of her body and personality. Nothing was more exciting or fulfilling than times spent with my child.
Mentally I remained challenged with new opportunities every day. I learned to be an immaculate and extremely organized homemaker. Everything ran like clockwork. By 9:00 in the morning, the house was clean - beds made, bathrooms cleaned, house vacuumed, baseboards washed, windows cleaned, laundry going. I enjoyed all the tasks that made my home sparkle and shine, but finished them quickly so that I could dedicate most of the day to my daughter. Between nursing, naps and staring at her, I thought of ways to improve my home and self. Even with all the chores, every day was filled with so much fun!
I was never bored.
I have a hard time understanding how a woman feels unfulfilled when she stays home with the little lives she has brought into the world. Isn't there joy and a sense of accomplishment at raising loving, kind and intelligent children? Unless home schooled, children eventually go to school outside the home and leave a mother all alone to become engaged in any adult activity that she sees fit. There are so many opportunities for a mother to enlighten her children to the world. Being a stay-at-home-mother is an active role. She needs to teach her children and learn their personality and needs. That is not an easy task nor can it be accomplished while engrossed in chatting on the phone all day, watching television all day or any other activity that completely draws all her attention away from the child ALL DAY.
Women who find staying at home boring need to go look in the mirror. Your home is as exciting as you make it and that requires effort. Motherhood is the most important job you will ever have - you are shaping the life of another human being. Everything you invest into the child is soaked up like a sponge and never forgotten. That sponge can be filled with good, bad or indifference, but the mother who is at home, day after day, hour after hour and minute after minute has a huge influence on what gets soaked up.
Being bored is simply an attitude. Life, motherhood and staying at home is just what a woman makes of it. If she is bored, it is time to expand the horizons and try something new. Not only will you stop being bored, but you will be a better person and mother to the child/children that watch your every move. Your actions are indelibly imprinted in their minds and not a thing you say goes unheard. Mothering is an art that requires time to practice and perfect just like playing a musical instrument.
I haven't posted this to judge anyone, but I am baffled by the "me" and "right now" generation. Take the time to develop and hone your skills as a homemaker and mother. Yes, motherhood does require skills if you want to excel at it if you want to really be a great mother. If you were trying to get a raise at a job outside the home, would you prop your feet up on the desk and turn on the soap operas? I doubt it.
One other thing...I want to say something to the woman with the four year old child in the grocery store tonight. Not only did I hear what you were saying to someone on your cellphone, but so did your four year old child. How do you think you made your innocent child feel when she heard you say, "I stay home all day long with a boring four year old who says 'Mommy, Mommy, Mommy' until I want to jump off a tall building. I would be so happy if I could afford to dump her in a daycare."
Yeah, sorry to say, but at that moment, I wished you HAD jumped off a tall building.
On a more positive note, this is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.
This week we once again enjoyed friendship and camaraderie. We still have a very active thread in The Redhead Riter's, Witty, Intelligent and Addictive Community where you can enter alone and just talk to yourself. I think everyone is getting better and better at this skill - It is a skill! I actually find it comforting to go in and start chatting because eventually someone will jump into the conversation.
With a big, heartfelt thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation. I am also posting the number of comments they made, so that you can see how dedicated and devoted they are to each other and the community.
- Joan at A Bad Marriage Is Fattening
- PJ at PJ's Prayer Line
- Richard at Divorce Lawyer in Augusta, Georgia
- Bev at eBlebco
- Aleta at Aleta's Arty Facts
- Zany Housewife at Zany Housewife
- Lori at Lori's LOLz
- Katlupe at Homesteading On The Internet
- Paula at This American Life
I'm so glad that I've been able to become friends with these wonderful people who are so active in my community. I encourage you to add their blogs to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with us in my community.
For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below (Yeah, we do crazy poses like that too because we are stylish LOL) and thank you for your participation!!
Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.
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